Young Man —
Trigger Warning: I talk about exercising and wanting to improve my health in this post.
So, I lied to my co-bloggers. I swore to them that I would be submitting the giant book review I’ve been promising for weeks. You may recall that in February enlisted our readers’ help in choosing books that I felt would round out my education as a Fat Acceptance activist. They voted and I got them.
I now want to share the information I gleaned from them, but the work necessary to prepare this mega-review feels like an oppressive book report. Being the slacker that I am, I have been procrastinating and stalling where possible. I thought I could get it done by today, but I was wrong.
But soon!
In any case, I had an interesting experience last night and I wanted to share some observations. I wrote on my blog about how our family has joined the YMCA and I’m interested to put Health at Every Size to the test. Regarding exercise, HAES recommends that you find a way to move your body that you find fun, as opposed to exercising as a way to expend calories.
I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what “fun” movement would be for me and I finally determined that bicycling was a good match. Veronica wanted to do water aerobics, so when I was looking for something to do in the meantime, I found Y-Cycling.
We decided to start last night, the only problem is that I only own two pairs of shoes: work and sandals. I called the Y and asked if I could do the cycling class in sandals and was told they don’t recommend it, but it would be okay.
As soon as I get home from work, I change and we rush over to get to our classes on time. We drop the girls off at the play area (both bolted for the foam playground thing without looking back) and V headed for the pool. It was then that I realized I had 15 minutes to kill.
So, I wandered around.
What I found surprised me. My mother-in-law belongs to a traditional gym and I’ve been in it once. As with other gyms I’ve seen, there are a few people on the heavy side, but the majority of members seem to be thin and/or muscular.
This sort of demographic intimidates me. I have no interest in being thin and/or muscular… just healthy. If I lose weight or gain muscle in the pursuit of health, so be it, but it is not my goal. My goal is to stick around as long as I can.
I’m uncomfortable around people whose sole aim is either losing weight or building muscle, since those people tend to be preachy about what you should or shouldn’t do to lose weight or build muscle too. I’m sorry, I just don’t care how oats and thrusts can make me crush beer cans betwixt my buttocks.
Not to mention the fact that I feel all paranoid when I’m one of the few schlubby fat guys working out: I can hear the barely-audible whispers and see the peripheral snickering.
As I self-consciously toured the facility, I began to notice something reassuring about the Y: significant numbers of active fatties.
Veronica made a joke about this after she got back from registering last week. “You’re going to love it,” she told me. “There are fat women everywhere!”
I knew water aerobics is a popular class for the Death Fatz among us, but I had never actually seen one in action. So, when I peeked in on V, she was at home with 20 or so other large women all splashing and flapping and lunging and bouncing. And she looked like she was having a great time too.
Best of all, the instructor at the front kept getting barraged by the impressive waves the women created.
I went to the gym next, where the weights and cardio machines were. Although the weight area was mostly muscled men, there were a few fat women working out, and the cardio machines were almost exclusively occupied by fat men and women.
When my class was finally about to start, I went upstairs and awkwardly introduced myself. I grabbed a cycle and was setting it up when the instructor (a fat woman) came in.
Unfortunately, she informed me that I could not join the class in sandals (BOO!), so I went down to the cardio machines and used a recombinant bike.
I’m not entirely sure, but after fucking with the onboard computer for about 15 minutes, I was certain that with the right combination of buttons, I could launch that bastard like Evel Knievel’s Sky-Cycle.
After several false starts, I finally settled in for 30 minutes of peddling. A fat guy sat next to me. A thin woman beside him. And there I peddled while watching Bill O’Reilly and John Stossel discuss ways of preventing “stupid people” and “leftists” from voting. If the peddling didn’t raise my heart rate, that mustachioed fascist sure as shit did.
When I finished, I headed toward the pool when a strange woman pointed at me and said, “You!” I looked around several times before I realized she meant me. “Your littlest one is freaking out. She’s calling for you.” I hurried to the day care, where Lottie was being held by a woman. She had a tear in her eye, but seemed okay.
It seems she was on the playground when a bunch of bigger kids ran toward it and scared her. Hopefully she won’t be too scarred for the next time.
At the end of the evening, we all went swimming to wear out the girls before heading home.
Although I wasn’t able to do Y-Cycling, I was able to take a test ride to see how sore I’d be. I’m kind of surprised, but the answer was not much, probably due to the walking I do in the morning to and from the train.
Coming soon is a new two-story rock climbing wall that I’m eager to scale like my personal fitness hero, Statistical Freak.
Veronica said that she thought her water aerobics class might be awkward, embarrassing or otherwise unpleasant. On the contrary, she had a great time, could feel the workout (although she wasn’t wiped out), and she looked forward to the next class.
And best of all, we both felt completely comfortable there. Zero judgment, zero snickering, zero condescension.
I can’t vouch for every YMCA in the country, but after a single visit I think it’s safe to say that our YMCA is fat friendly and family fun.
The rock climbing wall is super fun – plus really builds upper body strength for stuff like tossing small children up in the air!
The weird thing is, the rock climbing wall is IN the day care part. So, the girls will get to watch me climb and fall. I really just want to jump off from the top and let them dangle me down. That looks fun. I did repelling once when I was 13 and loved it.
Am I going to have to get a fourth pair of shoes just for this?
Peace,
Shannon
Climbing shoes make it easier, but you can climb in a good supportive pair of sneakers…. The ropes are most important!
I bet I could do it in sandals, but they probably won’t let me. And I’m going to say “no thank you” to the ropes. Real men climb without ‘em! Plus, I might be able to get disability if I fall from the top, so there’s that bonus.
Peace,
Shannon
Wow & Yay! I may just have to check out my local “Y” thanks to this. I had done the traditional gyms and even a “healthy lifestyle” one, but the propaganda got to me and I couldn’t do it anymore. I would prefer something activity based like swimming or cycling or something. Thank you for sharing this!
I would definitely check it out. I was, quite honest, shocked at how many fat people there were. I felt right at home. It’s pretty affordable too. They have free classes that come with membership (cycling is one of them) and some (like rock climbing) cost extra ($3 per day for climbing). I’ve only been one day, but I didn’t feel any of the pressure that I’ve felt at other gyms.
Peace,
Shannon
It sounds like a wonderful experience. I used to have a Y membership and really miss it. I can’t afford the extra outgo every month at this point.
I did find the staff at the Y to be very supportive and didn’t feel intimidated by a bunch of gym rats. It was a feeling of just regular people working out together. Size didn’t matter.
Cie,
I totally sympathize with the lack of money. We wouldn’t be able to swing it either if it weren’t for V’s parents.
Veronica said that when they were swimming there were two young, male lifeguards and she said that at no time did she feel as though they were snickering or talking about them. Whether that is because they’re just used to seeing fat women in water aerobics or if they’re trained to be respectful, it’s great that she feels comfortable there already.
There were definitely gym rats, but like you said, they didn’t make me feel uncomfortable. It was very much a “regular people” kind of place. We’re going back tonight, so we’ll see if it’s the same.
Peace,
Shannon
I’ve never done a climbing wall, just out in nature, looks like fun tho. Sounds like you might have hit on a friendly place that you can all do as a family thing, fun for everyone.
I’ve never done a climbing wall, but I’ve done repelling from a cliff and loved it. So far we’re happy with the experience. I hope it’s the same tonight.
Peace,
Shannon
Don’t you need climbing shoes?
And how is the wall climbing, a short one with matresses or a tall one with where you need to wear harness and use a rope.?
It’s a tall one with harness, which seems like it would be fun to jump from the top of. Not sure on the shoes. I’m inheriting my father-in-law’s tennis shoes tonight, so for a while, that will be my only option.
Peace,
Shannon
I used to be a memember of a traditional gym and was always floored over the number of rail thin people dressed in expensive workout gear not doing anything. They would loiter and talk to the trainers while batting eyelashes and wrinkling their noses at the smell.
Definately a judgemental vibe going on where I was but I always had a book and music to avoid others.
The Y sounds like a fantastic place that’s family friendly and cost effective so maybe I’ll take a look at ours:)
I felt a bit like a caveman on the bike. This lady grabbed a book rack to hang over the monitor and I thought, “GENIUS!” Next time I’m bringing an iPod or a book. Screw Bill O’Reilly!
And definitely check it out. They seemed to have all the equipment of your standard gym, just none of the prestige and judgment. I think I can handle that.
Peace,
Shannon
im really lucky to live in a a tiny community (north Kansas City…not to be confused with huge and poor kansas city) that gets all the casino dollars from the big city folks
we have a world class local community center with a state of the art gym, indoor running track, free classes for members (except for yoga boooo!) a GREAT pool area with full steamroom/suana/hirlpool setup. In addition to lap lanes, there is a lazy river if walking against the current is your thing…waterslides too, and a vortex pool AND a kids climbing area all in teh pool…as well as free freaking childcare…all for 30$, 50 a month for families. we dont use it much during the summer since we also live by a fantastic park and swim for free at the local wading pool or the apt complex down the road my brother lives in, but that pool is a godsend in the winter.
and because of the demographic here its all fat women, old women or frail men. we have a few assisted living centers up ehre, and then lots of small families, ie fat soccer moms. I never tried the zumba class (like i want to but am scared to) but the water areobics was stupidly easy. like desiged for 70 year olds easy…i just went and swam the backstroke for a mile.
And THAT is why I’m in favor of raising taxes. Communities need spaces like this, especially for the poor and elderly.
They have a zumba class here, but we need to get comfortable in our individual specialties before we start branching off into actual, physical movement stuff. It sounds like fun, though. V used to be a swimmer when she was a kid and I wonder if she would want to do laps instead. I’ll have to ask her that.
Peace,
Shannon
Zumba is fun!
I joined a few gyms in my time. Be it because I really don’t like doing cardio inside when there are perfect running/walking trails right outside my house (I found that I actually like running after sloughing through three weeks of being short of breath in the beginning) or because I’m a bit more muscled than the “ladies” at the regular gyms, I hated it there. I hated the protein shakes that were forced on me, the sunbank tans everyone was sporting and the airconditioned sweat hanging around. I disliked being judged for my body. I disliked being judged for liking to work out in sloppy men’s sweatpants and oversized tees.
I joined something similar to a Y here in Germany- and I’m having FUN taking all these classes! Zumba is one of my favorites. It’s great for starting out building endurance on the beginners’ level (and let me say, I’m not all too out of shape, but this class was HARD!) as you can choose your own intensity a lot (at least with the instructors at my local “sports club”). The advanced level is basically an hour of jumping around like Speedy Gonzales on crack- FUN!
And by the way, erilyn- there’s this wonderfully shapely girl in my class who’s kicking our collective butts every single time. I have never seen anyone give her anything but admiring looks.
Not that there’s a lot of body-judging going on in that club. There’s a few classes where it’s more common than others, but those are the ones I tend to avoid anyway as they seem to consist of posing in skin-tight clothing (aerobics for example). Just go for it! There’s cool music with every Zumba class!
Shannon, sorry if I’m sounding preachy here but… if you can afford them in any way invest in a pair of sneakers that fit you right. For one, no blisters or hotspots (yes, you can get them from cycling because your feet move in your shoes. Ask my dad!). For two, no twisted ankles. For three- more fun MOVING!
I love all your posts on here. They make me want to become an activist, and I’m about the most politically lazy person on the planet.
Thanks Nell. And don’t worry about being preachy, I know I need shoes. In fact, Veronica picked me up a pair yesterday. I now own THREE pairs of shoes. I’m on my way to becoming Imelda Marcos!
I’m interested in Zumba, but we’re going to have to work our way up to it. We’ll do it eventually, but we’re easing into our fitness routine before we make any commitments. Last night I finally got to do my Y-cycling class and it kicked my ass! I was so grateful when a half hour into it one of the daycare ladies came to get me because our youngest was inconsolable. The teacher had already told us that none of us could leave early, but now I had an excuse. That damned bike seat really bruised my ass!
As far as judgments, I’m kind of surprised there are any in Germany. I was under the impression that Germany was fairly accepting of fat people. Is that not the case?
Peace,
Shannon
Happy you got shoes! There’s nothing nastier than needless blistering in uncomfortable places.
I admire you for trying Y-cycling. I’ve been terrified of bikes ever since a class trip to the Appalachians involving me on a gearshift-less bike… and the rest of the class on state-of-the-art Shimanos. I also envy your wife for being able to swim- chlorine turns me into a collection of hives and sore red eyes.
It’s a little less obvious than in the States, the fat hatred, but it’s definitely there. There’s unequal pay, unequal employment opportunities (in some businesses, they will only take people up to a size 38 (about a 6 or 8, depending on the couturier) to work, e.g. flight attendants. For “decoration” at the automobile fairs, the size requirements are even more strict), unequal treatment at school, fat hatred comments, harassment…
I’m a lawyer, working in international business law, which is one of the most image-obsessed businesses there is. Most of my older female colleagues are on a permanent diet (oh no! The d-word!) of champagne (they call it “prosecco” here), diet pills and aerobics. The pressure to be perceived as both attractive and intelligent is immense- some of these colleagues employ personal stylists (most partners employ personal trainers).
German society seems very… leveling to me. They don’t like deviations from the norm, but deviations toward the lesser are preferred to people sticking their head in the clouds. Fat people are being treated especially nasty if they’re trying to get out of their “place” at the bottom of the food-chain. Fat men have it easier than fat women here, being as they seem rather backwards in the whole gender equality debate here.
On a whole, since there are less bigger people here (can’t speak about rural areas, I’m living in a big city), size-ism is less prominent. It’s still there, though, and all-pervasive. Most fitness studios are just prime examples of it.
I guess it’s the same all over the world- if you want to see the discrimination there it is. If you don’t, well, just don’t take off your blindfold.
I am trying to guess if Spain (where I come from), is more fat friendly than USA or not.
There is a new law that will ban all discrimination for weight, but at the same time it will ban the junk food in the schools, it will ban the toys in fast food chains like McDonalds, and it will ban the publicity of fast food directed to the kids.
So in one hand the government is trying to fight the fat discrimination, but in the other hand there are a lot of fear of the obesity timebomb.
Anyway, I have been climbing for 14 years and I know the things that the veterans says to the novices. “Mind your feet” is the first and more useful. And the other two are “fly or die”, and “Big mistake pancake” but you have to climb a couple of years more
.
I hope that you and your kids enjoy the climbing.