New diet surgery
Trigger warning: Incredibly disturbing new kind of weight loss surgery.
The way the medical world treats us fatties really astounds me. First, they put us on diets for our own good. Then, they misdiagnose us and blame everything from earaches to pneumonia to asthma to epilepsy on our obesity (this is my personal experience, people). I have had doctors think I was lying to them because I COULDN’T POSSIBLY have not eaten anything all day before having the seizure that sent me to the emergency room, although that doctor felt dumb when my 10-year-old set him straight, along with my blood work.
Then, we have the wonder-filled world of bariatric surgery. There are primarily two types of weight loss surgery done today and I, for the record, am against both of them since I have either lost someone or know someone who has ruined their lives on each of these procedures. In gastric bypass, a small stomach pouch is created with a stapler device,and connected to the distal small intestine. The upper part of the small intestine is then reattached in a Y-shaped configuration. The other procedure involves making a smaller pouch in the stomach for food to digest in either removing part surgically or else using the lap-band, which cinches off part of the stomach using a medical device, creating .
Well, a new surgurey is hitting the shelves in Venezuela (not yet readily availy in the US, but you know the lengths they want us fatties to go to). According to an article in Time magazine, this procedure involves sewing an abrasive patch of Marlex (used in both hernia repair and hula hoops) onto the tongue for a month at a time, rendering the consumption of all solid foods extremely painful. The idea was introduced in 2009 by Nikolas Chugay, a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon. He sees it as a way to help patients lose weight without the fully invasive bariatric surgery.
The patch certainly has its own downsides. Securing an abrasive foreign object to the tongue comes with plenty of side-effects. Patients can experience speech difficulties, while others have trouble sleeping.
“At the start you can’t even move your tongue for the pain. I’ve tried to eat solid food but it’s impossible,” says Yomaira, speaking from her family home in Charallave, an industrial conurbation on the outskirts of the Caracas. “It’s a huge inconvenience, but I’m doing it to feel better about myself. I was very fat.”
“It’s a good solution, I don’t see it as extreme,” says Alicia Zamora, Yomaira’s mother. “It teaches you to eat differently and proves that there are alternatives.”
God, when will these people learn that IF IT AIN’T BROKEN DONT FIX IT. Good God, we don’t need to sew velcro to our tongues just so we won’t eat. Just let me be, and believe me when I tell you what I ate today (which was some beans and a nice submarine sandwich, TYVM). Oh, and keep your surgery away from my fat ass.