Autism Speaks preys upon their view that Autism is a tragedy, and keeps plugging away at conveying it as such.

That, in a nutshell, better than everything I said, is why I hate them. I am not, nor have I ever been, a walking tragedy. Neither is Jackie. Neither are Shaunta or Karen’s children. Nor should we ever have to feel that we are.

Autism Speaks claims to care about families with children who have Autism, they are lying. They act as if the person with Autism is less than human, and only focuses on how the parents and the siblings (presumably Neurotypical) suffer. They are a coddle organization for parents who have children on the Autism Spectrum.

Now, I understand people might be ignorant as to who they are, and think that they’re doing a good thing to support them, or that they are there to support them and their child on the Autism Spectrum. There are parents who are addicted to hearing they are a martyr on behalf of their child with a form of Autism, it is Autism Speaks who provides support for these types of parents.

They take advantage of parents who want to be told there is hope their child can be “normal”, the sad fact is that these parents don’t realize they are doing immense damage to their child and are incredibly selfish by acting as if they never are good enough. I knew a father like this, he went to countless quacks who were more than willing to take his money, to tell him what he wanted to hear. He’s in complete denial that his son has a form of Autism, he’s immature and like a child who believes if they hope enough, and wish hard enough, their “real” child will come back to them.

This is the core of Autism Speak’s campaign. I’ve heard of them leading parents in chants where they sing that they’ll defeat Autism, and call on the powers of voodoo. It was a part of one of the I Am Autism YouTube videos. I’d look it up, but I can’t bring myself to hear a minute of that awfulness without cringing. Autism Speaks leads parents in sing a longs against the big bad Autism,

The problem is they are catering to these parents, who seem once they find out they have a child with Autism, revert to magical thinking and childish behavior.I can understand this as a coping strategy for awhile. Autism Speaks instead of seeing this as a part of coping that shouldn’t be encouraged, as something to encourage so they can get money.

The reason Allison Tepper-Singer was able to say she’d wish she could drive her Autistic child off a bridge with her, is because Autism Speaks above everything else, is about treating parents who have children with Autism, as if they are children themselves. Indulging them in sing a long songs, telling them how they suffer and nobody understands, convincing them they’re poor poor babies who didn’t deserve to have a child with a form of Autism given to them. You’ll see that parents who do deeply care about their children with Autism, don’t participate in this nonsense after they realize what it’s for.

Autism Speaks preys upon their view that Autism is a tragedy, and keeps plugging away at conveying it as such. Keeping parents of Autistic children giving them money, to go to a hug convention, and be told that they’re amazing, when parents who are amazing care for their child with a form of Autism no matter what. They don’t go to places, where they are coddled and hand held, because they are adults who understand having a child isn’t a guarentee you’ll get a perfect Barbie or Ken doll child. It’s a support group for parents who simply aren’t adult enough to handle having a child that is different.

I’m sorry this has become such a long post, but I’m trying my best to convey, how disgusting it is that children with Autism who truly do suffer from living in a society that is intolerant and cruel towards them, are ignored in favor of supporting grown adults by treating them as if they are in need of special support. It’s not only insulting to parents of children with Autism Spectrum Disorders that do rather than hide under the covers, and hope the big bad Autism will go away. It is putting children with forms of Autism in danger, because Autism Speak’s cult like agenda does convince parents that the only answer is something drastic like driving off a bridge and killing their child with ASD.

Let me explain, that by telling these parents that they can completely age regress to the behavior of a 3 year old because of the trauma of being born a imperfect child, they are encouraging the parents to think like 3 year olds. When your 3 you can claim the boogeyman is coming to get you, but you’ll have a parent that offers the perspective that it’s not real. Nobody is telling these parents that acting as if their child’s ASD is a boogeyman, that it’s unrealistic. Instead they keep building up the drama of how the parents suffer, how it’s the fault of their child having Autism, and the notion that if they sing their little songs and wish upon a star really really hard their child will be normal. In case you have haven’t figured it out by now, the concept that people are putting children at risk by taking advantage of weak parents and programming them to think like scared children, disgusts me.

I have had to face adversity since my first day at school, I’ve had to cope with things that would break many Neurotypical children. I didn’t get any babycoddling, and I would be offended if someone suggested I needed it because I have Asperger’s Syndrome. I have more strength in my pinkie, than these supposed adults who pay money to go to a Autism Speaks convention, having their little storytime, juice and cookies, and then lead into spooky songs about the big bad Autism. That is more than pathetic, it’s like what business do they have in having children if they are children. That’s what the real problem is here.

It’s hard enough having a parent who is immature and selfish raising a Neurotypical child, let alone one with a form of Autism. Instead of supporting their kids, they’re going for a crying kicking screaming fit against Autism because if they aren’t constantly told that they’re being really big boys and girls by coping with a child who has a form of Autism on a daily basis, they’re going to pout scream and stomp around until they are paid attention to. These aren’t parents who can even function, without constant praise, their children have to deal with bullies, teachers who are abusive, and then come home to parents who talk about them having Autism the way a pouty child talks about how they hate broccoli? These children deserve better, than parents who are so pathetic they have to go to a group kindergarten, because having a child with a form of Autism is so bad.

I hope you understand why I’m ranting and what I’m trying to convey here. Children who grow up with forms of Autism have to deal with adult life and situations earlier than Neurotypical children. The last thing they need is to come home to parents that they need to be a parent to, and understand because they have to go to the latest thumb-sucking Autism Speaks rally.

These children are going to have to grow up very quickly, because they had the unfortunate position of being born to children in the bodies of adults. I absolutely have no respect for a parent, who thinks that coping by going back into childhood, while their child is having to suffer through theirs. It is not just selfish, it is neglectful, and it is abusive. No, I’m not saying every single parent who supports Autism Speaks is like this, they may just not be wise to what they’re being sold. For the parents who stay, and convince themselves that the support their getting is more substantial than preschool time, they need psychiatric help. It is unfair that their child should feel they are lesser, when it is the reality their parents weren’t adult enough to be responsible for them. That while they’re dealing with the real world, their parents are hiding behind Autism Speaks’ huggy time baby has an emotional boo boo conventions.

That son I was talking about, his father still is dragging him around as a pity token, paying people to tell him he’s a big brave boy, and they can help save his son from the mean old dragon. I told my mom, who for some reason still remained friends with his wife, that he was beyond pathetic. It’s the children who suffer from Autism Speak’s “understanding” that having a child with a form of Autism, will be so traumatic that all the parents will be able to do is have hour long crying jags, self comforting rock sessions, and need to come to their group meetings to get a coddle. They are making it manifest destiny that these parents become as stereotypically Autistic as Autism Speaks believes their children to be. Why is this organization which destroys the functionality of parents, or feeds their addiction to be pitied and told they’re martyrs, getting funding? Would we fund Jim Jone’s cult too, if they told people they were curing Autism?

I am not pleased with the implications of what has been said about me. Adelene, I understand that you are probably coming from a place of pain with your accusation, so I will try my best not to increase that pain.

Those who have come to defense of my words are on the right path of understanding why I wrote what I did. I never said that I felt that my son being autistic was worse than being neurotypical. You have read far too much into my parental guilt and apparently not read enough of the glowing praise I had for my son. Either you simply did not understand my praise as such (although I’m a bit lost as to how anyone could have missed it), or you chose only to see negative in what I had to say. Either way, I urge you to please re-read what I originally wrote.

Now, onto the true matter at hand: Parental Guilt. Parental guilt is a vicious monster that attaches itself to one the instant they find out that a child will be coming into their life. I am going to assume (Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!) that you are not a parent at this moment. If you were then you would surely understand how parental guilt will rear its ugly head in some of the strangest of ways. The instant you find out that a child is coming into your life you are hit with the crushing realization that you are now in charge of not fucking up a human life, which is quickly followed by the even more crushing realization that you will, indeed, fuck up this human life in some pretty amazing ways. The way I see it, if you’re parenting and you don’t have at least a small shred of guilt over things that you have no control over, and that isn’t nearly as horrible as some others or yourself make it out to be, then you probably aren’t parenting right.

You have mistaken my parental guilt for ableism. It may not make sense to you to feel guilty about something that is neutral or positive, but believe me, as a parent, guilt is a whole different monster than your everyday “Shit, I broke my mother’s priceless vase” guilt.
I do NOT view my son as anything other than the blessing he is. If you think that I think that my son is less than because of his autism, then you clearly missed the part of my post that talked about the fact that in the rare moments that I might consider wishing he was neurotypical I stop myself, because I realize that he wouldn’t be MY child any more, and that I love that child with every ounce of my being.

I hope that this has cleared up some of the confusion. In the end though, the fact remains that all you know of me is a single guest post on a blog and a comment on that post, and you do not, in fact, truly know me. Those who do know me know the truth of my character, the strength of my love, and the depth of my pain.