Entering Paradise —
Think of the most stylish person you know.
Celebrity or not.
When you consider his/her personal style and/or fashion sense, what does it conjure up in your mind?
I have no clue because I have no personal style and/or fashion sense, therefore it is impossible for me to pick any single person with accuracy. But I’ll go with somebody classic.
Let’s say Jackie O.
Beautiful, right?
Fashionable?
You might even call her a “stylista,” perhaps?
Okay, question: what would you say her biggest fashion accessory is?
I know, broad question, but give it some thought.
I’ll wait.
I thought of confidence, gracefulness and poise.
What did you come up with?
Did you come up with health?
In other words, does health have anything to do with fashion?
Bonnielee Cuevas thinks so.
And she’s looking at you, woefully mistaken fatties… I mean, potential “Curvy Stylistas.”
You see, not only do the Curvy Stylistas need yet another lecture on the health risks of being a Curvy Stylista, but veiled threats as well.
Metabolic Syndrome is a series of risk factors that can cause heart disease, heart attacks and in some cases lead to death. These factors are not limited to high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and insulin resistance.
She dare not speaketh the mysterious factors beyond the limits of high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and insulin resistance. And if that weren’t bad enough…
Unhealthy eating habits and lack of physical activities contribute to weight gain and an increase in risk factors for other diseases.
Did you read that? Not only does your fatness put you at risk for mysterious factors, but your fatness could lead to additional fatness and mystery factors for other insidious diseases, like tuberculosis, stinkfoot and shickets.
But the deepest risk of all — the risk that keeps Bettylue Cuervo up at night — is that possibility that left untreated, your fatness could lead to a fatal case of frowiness.
The fact is Curvy Stylistas never choose unhealthy lifestyles.
Um… I’m gonna let the late Gary Coleman handle this one.
Excuse me? Curvy Stylistas never choose unhealthy lifestyles?
Really?
Do you drug test? Because I know a few current Curvy Stylistas with a serious laughing gas addiction that could get them kicked out.
But seriously, Curvy Stylistas never choose unhealthy lifestyles?
Okay, question number one: are Curvy Stylistas significantly different from their slender counterparts?
Because I don’t think the Skinny Stylistas know about this whole “no unhealthy lifestyles” rule.
And remember Jackie O?
Health and fashion are not related.
What is related to my health, however, is my own damned business.
Just because I’m fat does not mean that my personal life, my personal choices, my personal decisions are in any way, shape or form open to your broad, sweeping criticism.
Curvy Stylistas never choose unhealthy lifestyles.
Curvy Stylistas never smoke? Never drink? Never have unprotected sex? Never smuggle 46 kilos of black tar heroin in every available orifice?
With this definition, I’d say the number of puritans who qualify for Curvy Stylista status is quite an abbreviated list.
Does stress count? How about poor sleep quality?
Ooooooh, I’ve known some unmedicated, mentally unstable Curvy Stylistas in my life. Are they in the clear?
Or are you, Bobbysue Cueball, telling me that the only lifestyle choices which impact one’s status as Curvy Stylista is diet and exercise?
Are you saying that if I, a fully grown adult human, did not choose to spend the requisite “30-60 minutes for a minimum of 3 days per week” and eat foods deemed appropriate, then I cannot enjoy my own fashion sense? My own style?
Are you really saying that?
And just what is the point of you telling this?
Because I’m pretty sure that you have no way of verifying this, and neither does anyone else.
You’re laying this at our feet… this admonishment, this lecture, this guilt trip.
You tell us that “Without health she would fail to leap forward and sample a designer sale, or drive cross country to obtain a new perfume that is only available in Macy’s New York” as though the only options in life are health or hermitage.
As though only those who choose (or, I should say, have the luxury of choosing) are capable of embracing life, and fashion, passion and zeal. As though my life were a simple equation of Exercise + Whole Foods = Joie De Vivre.
Well, they’re not.
And it’s incredibly insulting to imply otherwise.
Just admit it, Billybob Caviar, this post has absolutely nothing to do with with health and everything to do with fatness. It has everything to do with your belief that if a person is fat then he/she must not be exercising or eating properly. And these unfortunate people need you to step in and set them straight.
But you can’t just say, “Hey lazy fatty, get your ass in gear.” Oh no, you have to make this about something else, something other than maternalistic intrusion.
No, it’s not simply that we’re fat and you think we’re too stupid or too oblivious to have taken the constant barrage of anti-obesity messages to heart.
So, you wrap it up in style. You dress it up in fashion and say, “Get healthy or you’ll never be a Curvy Stylista.”
In short, you’re using chic extortion.
To me, that is despicable.
As most of our readers know, Fierce, Freethinking Fatties was founded on the philosophy (Woo! Alliteration!) that body autonomy is one of our most basic rights as human beings. We choose the risks we are willing to take and nobody else gets a say, unless we want them to have a say.
If you want to spend your life on a futile quest for a few less pounds, go for it. We believe you can still be fat positive and dieting. Very few people ever achieve perfection in self-acceptance, so we provide support for those who waver back and forth between righteous self-adoration and the uncertainty of self-dissatisfaction.
Your blogs, your journals, your personal experiences are welcome here, regardless of where you are on the self-acceptance trail. We do not judge, we do not lecture, we do not chastise, we do not threaten or coerce or manipulate.
We listen.
We support.
We empathize.
We understand.
That is the path I would hope xoxoSkorch would pursue in the future: the path of understanding.
Understanding that not everyone is ready to, or even wants to, lead a healthy life. And that those that do have plenty of opportunities to educate themselves about how to go about it. Skorch can be one of those opportunities, providing information on how to improve one’s health through improved diet and exercise.
But to claim that health is mandatory, or to imply that a fat body must be camouflaged to mimic a thin body, is inappropriate, especially for a magazine that claims to be fat friendly.
If Skorch must make health a part of it’s mission, then I would urge Jessica Kane to read “Health at Every Size” by Dr. Linda Bacon and to apply the principals found within toward that mission. Jessica, your publication does not have to engage in body shaming in order to promote health for your readers. You simply need to provide the educational materials and let your readers do the rest.
Finally, I would urge everyone who reads Fierce, Freethinking Fatties to contact Jessica and let her know how you feel about these issues. I don’t care if you agree or disagree with what I’ve written or with what any of the other fatshion bloggers have written about the issue. The important thing is that we let Kane Kreative know what is important to us in a fat fashion magazine.
You can contact Jessica through Twitter or Facebook.
xoxoSkorch, this is your opportunity to blaze a new trail in fashion. This is your opportunity to show the world that fat women do not need of camouflage and lectures. They just want to be treated with the same dignity and respect that thin women take for granted, both in the fashion world and the world at large.
xoxoSkorch, this is your opportunity to choose: will you offer fashion for fat women or fatshion?
Dude… this would make my life sooooooo much easier…
“Exercise + Whole Foods = Joie De Vivre”
I would prefer the equation:
Cake + Pot = Lots and Lots of Money
I’m not sure how we can swing that.
Peace,
Shannon
It’s so hard for me…now that I have learned that I am not a curvy fashionista because I go out for drinks, have the occasional cigarette, have had unprotected sex…
Geez.
How am I going to live with myself? I guess I’ve been ousted by the community.
Sigh.
If I were you, I would invest in burlap bags, and LOTS of them. It’s just not worth the hassle of even trying once you know you can’t be a Curvy Stylista.
Peace,
Shannon
You made me laugh. You moved me. You made me feel fierce. Awesome piece.
That middle part, starting with the line “”Fierce, Freethinking Fatties was founded on the philosophy that body autonomy is one of our most basic rights as human beings.” Man, I would love to see that edited into our existing Philosophy page.
Thanks Elizebeth,
I’ll be sure to add that in.
Peace,
Shannon
I. Love. Your. Writing.
That being said, I can completely agree that PERSONALLY I am confused with what way Skorch should go…and that the content lately has been controversial. Maybe my downfall is I don’t take the issue as seriously as some, so when I read Bonnie’s article, I honestly felt she was just saying eat well, be active, and that “accessory” is really confidence. As a 310lb woman, I’ve struggled with weight/health my entire life, and I read the articles more light-heartedly…I would hope that everything wasn’t taken so seriously, but again, it IS a serious topic for those who dedicate their lives to fat acceptance.
We are all normal people with a full time life doing Skorch on the side and I think we’ll get there.
I am not a hater or do I judge, and I truly love anyone who is intelligent and passionate, like you…so thank you for your feedback and I wish all a happy and healthy life.
Warm regards,
Jessica Kane
Publisher of Skorch
Jessica,
Thank you for reading and commenting. As I’ve said before, fat fashion has something to teach us about Fat Acceptance and Fat Acceptance has something to teach you about fat fashion. We orbit two very different worlds within the community of fat people, which is inhabited by millions who have very different experiences of the being fat.
I don’t expect you to transform Skorch into a PR publication for Fat Acceptance, but FA blogs cover a variety of subjects that many of your readers are sensitive to. One of those issues is body autonomy and the constant barrage of media messages that try to wrest that control from autonomy from us. For the past 40 years, that message has said that fat is ugly and the only way to be socially acceptable is to get thin. Many women have struggled, and failed, repeatedly to achieve this ideal and feel an intense level of frustration and, often, self-loathing for not being able to transform their bodies into the socially-desirable type.
What science has taught us in the past decade, though, is that health and thinness are not synonymous. A person can exercise and eat healthy, yet still be fat, whether at a glance or on the scale. So fat people who do take their health seriously are often dismissed by the general public as delusional… that, really, they are knocking on death’s door.
Fat Acceptance is about educating people that society doesn’t always know what’s best for you and that your self-acceptance does not have to wait until you achieve your goal weight. It is also, often, about tackling the science of fat and trying to get to the truth, rather than a media-filtered version of the truth.
I think that people in the FA movement have grown comfortable with their place on the fatosphere, but don’t always remember that the “real” world is still going on around us. That there are still fat people who haven’t learned what we’ve learned about HAES or that still think that fat = hideous. And when we encounter these people, there’s almost a feeling of pity that they are still operating on the old paradigm.
And I think that when a publication like yours comes out and seems to offer so much hope, yet sometimes reinforces that old paradigm, it can come as a double shock to us. We sort of expect everyone to be as “enlightened” as we are and take offense when they aren’t. We’re passionate about getting the truth out there (as you have seen) and we want to work with you to promote the best message you can.
We’ll be discussing the ways Skorch can do that on Thursday and I hope you’ll be back to take a look. Thanks again for participating.
Peace,
Shannon
Thank you Shannon.
I am here to listen and learn, while maintaining my own beliefs. I believe in happy mediums and balance - in anything in life, from food to fashion to blogging to facebook. Unfortunately, I’m really bad at balance!!!!
I think that’s really the reason I started my own personal blog on life and style - http://www.curvyconfident30something.com - kind of my way of figuring it all out.
Much love,
Jessica Kane
Absolutely. Cling to your beliefs and listen to others with the possibility of changing your mind. I have a knack for saying, “I’m wrong.” It’s the only way I ever advance my knowledge.
Peace,
Shannon
Here you go again bringing up the black tar heroin oraface issue. That was a LONG time ago and I’ve moved on!
I actually had to think long and hard before I commented on this . Even read the post TWICE. Can you believe that?
Anyway, initially the point of it all was lost on me since I’m so fashion backward and don’t look at many magazines having to do with these things, but I guess I see both sides of the coin here.
Publications looking for good content and to shake things up a little sometimes stray from the original path upsetting some readers.
Loyal readers sometimes feel duped by these detours and changes.
In this particular case though, you are right to focus on the phrase about curvy stylistas not choosing unhealthy lifestyles. That’s a bit crazy.
Now I’m going to go smuggle some stuff the RIGHT way.
Oh, yeah, act like I’m the bad guy for bringing it up, but who had to hold the flashlight and tongs?
This guy.
I do not envy Jessica’s job. To be such a high profile fat fashion magazine in the middle of a War on Fat? Not an easy path to blaze. I’m glad she’s willing to listen, though, and isn’t just dismissing our concerns.
Peace,
Shannon
Oh, and I forgot to add……great post Shannon AND great reply from Jessica from Skorch.
Oh also, I smuggle things in my orifices not orafaces. You should have given me a spelling test before you let me in here.
Actually, I think it’s “orifii.”
Peace,
Shannon
Awesome post and awesome responses from everyone (had me laughing out loud and my husband asking what was so funny on my computer). The problem I have with “Curvy Stylistas never choose unhealthy lifestyles” is that those of us who have diseases that have no cures aren’t healthy and we sure as hell didn’t choose to have those diseases, and the majority of those diseases aren’t caused by being fat. We’re as healthy as we can be, but not as healthy as we’d be if we didn’t have those diseases, so is Bonnielee saying that we can’t be Curvy Stylistas just because we aren’t as healthy as she thinks we should be, by virtue of those diseases (of course, because we’re also fat, I’d be willing to bet that she thinks we have them because of our fat even though there is no causation cited by medical experts for those diseases [MS, scoliosis, cerebral palsy, fibromyalgia, just to name a few]).
Thanks vesta,
I’m going to assume that the author is not so cruel as to suggest that people who are unhealthy due to unrelated illnesses. I think she was only talking about the fatties who eat too much and don’t exercise. So, I think she was say that if you have a choice and you choose not to be healthy, then you are not eligible to be Curvy Stylista.
Sorry!
Peace,
Shannon
“Unhealthy eating habits and lack of physical activities contribute to
weight gain andan increase in risk factors for other diseases.”There, fixed that for them. Great article, Shannon!
Aaaaaaaaaaaah, much better.
Thanks Jen!
Peace,
Shannon