How NOT To Be A Dieter in Fat Acceptance
Trigger Warning — If you click on the link in this, mega weight loss evangelism… MEGA!
I know I mentioned a couple of weeks back that (while I do not think of myself as one), by many folks’ definitions of the word, I am a dieter.
But I assure you, my lifestyle is my own business, and I would never just decide one day to take my ostensibly Fat Accepting, Body Accepting blog and come whupping out with a bunch of diet evangelism, complete with hysterical CAPS LOCK WARNINGS IN BOLD about OMGbesity and how all of the sudden it’s the worst thing ever and everyone should change their lives and follow the “lifestyle change” I have been on for two weeks.
But last week, that’s exactly what came across my feed reader from Vanessa Reece.
Again — WARNING — don’t read unless you want to hear about how WRONG you are for being fat accepting…
This post, specifically…
But this thing came across my reader and just pissed me off.
Because this blog clearly has done a 180 from Fat Acceptance (otherwise why would it be coming to me in a FAT ACCEPTANCE FEED?) to OMG EVERYONE HAS TO BE ON A DIET in just two weeks. Yeah — this is the “Two week lifestyle review” — so this person has changed her behavior… and lost an amount of weight in the last two weeks… and now all of a sudden she’s posting things like:
Wake up people!
and
Who’s Brave Enough?
and other giant headers that I don’t want to copy in here.
Seriously?
You have modified your behavior for two weeks, seen a result from that, and suddenly the whole world needs to change everything they have thought and felt and worked for in how they feel about their bodies because YOU HAVE DECIDED TO TRY TO LOSE WEIGHT?
This is exactly why there is such a controversy about having the voices of people who do decide to control their weight in the FA arena.
Just because you have done something for a couple of weeks does not mean it will work for me. It does not mean it will work for my life. It CERTAINLY does not negate all the science and research that supports the idea that Fat and Healthy can go together in the same sentence.
You can’t just lose a little weight and then decide that all those people who made sense a couple of weeks ago now know nothing and are stupid just because they do not want to join in the weight loss carnival that you have going on.
Now… this is her blog, and certainly she can do what she likes with it. And, apparently (from the remarks in this post), she did announce that people could drop her feed if they wanted to.
But honestly?
If I was going to suddenly decide that instead of a blog based around the ideas of FA and HAES and other things related to FA, I was going to start a blog with a weight tracker and post my daily workouts, etc., and talk about how GREAT I am for my INCREDIBLE LIFESTYLE CHANGE…
Well, I like to think that I would at least have the decency to start a NEW BLOG with a different URL, a different RSS feed, and join a feed or community that was all about my NEW FOCUS, not try to keep my old audience and drag them (many of them I must KNOW ARE ACTUALLY RECOVERING FROM DIET-BASED EATING DISORDERS) into my new lifestyle with me.
So there it is… just a little advice to anyone who is thinking of setting up a diet evangelism site in the Fat Acceptance community. Um, yeah, don’t.
Oh, and also? If you are going to insist on getting all up in people’s business about how THEY SHOULD DO IT TOO!!!! Maybe wait until you’ve actually lost a significant amount of weight and kept it off for 5 years before trying to get everyone on board your diet train. TWO WEEKS?!
I’m with you. While I technically am a dieter as well in that I still tend to look for something that might work to take off a few pounds and decrease the size of my butt and abdomen, that is my issue, and I would never insist that everyone else make it their issue. I believe that acceptance of oneself at whatever size is actually key to living an more healthy life, because health starts with happiness. Dietary changes should be made based on overall health, not on weight loss. As a former bulimic, I am still working on actually accepting myself. I may never get there, but nor will I drag others down with me.
Wow. You know there is immense pressure to toe the line in society when someone can snap like that all of a sudden. The really sad part is that in 5 years she’ll be back writing fat acceptance because her diet will have failed and she’ll be even bigger than she was before. I’m not exactly going out on a limb here when 95% of diets fail.
And really, I agree… after only two weeks?
I believe you missed the point. Don’t be so narrow minded.
A,
What do you believe the point was?
Peace,
Shannon
It seems that point was that she has decided that losing weight is good for her. Well…. fine, good for her. But then deciding that everyone else is BSing themselves if they don’t want to “get to a better weight”, well, that’s not right. People make their own decisions, and if you want to call yourself body-accepting, telling people that THEIR bodies are unacceptable, well, no… I am not down with that.
The BS part, to me, is believing that diets work and that you CAN get down to a lower weight. Well, she does have that 5% chance, it’s her right to roll the dice. And it’s our right to point out how low her chances are, how high the risk of weight regain is, and the associated risks of yo yo dieting.
Excellent, excellent, excellent.
This is a perfect illustration of our new Diet Talk policy.
I think Vanessa is confused as to what “dieting” means. In the post you included, she writes, “You do not need to diet or take slimming pills. You need to know how your body works, what foods to put in it and how to maintain a normal BMI.”
I have to say, though that she has been somewhat consistant in her logic. In this post, she wrote “No diets – just better eating and exercise. You will get to a weight that is better for your body.”
Well what the hell is a diet if not better eating and exercise to reduce your weight (i.e., “get to a weight that is better for your body”). In the same post, she wrote, “Only a small percentage of fat people can say they are fat due to anything but not eating right and not exercising on a daily basis.”
And yet, in this post she wrote “What we ask for in size-acceptance is to bring an end to misconceptions that all fat people are lazy and the general name calling to stop. For better understanding in who we are and not what we look like.” She also wrote, “If I come to a decision to lose weight it will be because I made it on my own – not through name calling, bullying tactics or anything of that ilk.”
Yet in the previous article I linked to, she wrote, “But it struck me with the messages I receive in my inbox – some teenager somewhere thinks that being over 200lbs is o.k. and they too can be glamorous. No one says you can’t be glamorous – you just can’t really be healthy. It’s not o.k. – most of us are not healthy – Let’s be honest and stop BS-ing ourselves; if you’re wheezing, or you’re waddling down the road from A – B that is not healthy. You know it – I know it.”
Okay, so you can’t be over 200 pounds and healthy and, extending that logic, if you’re over 200 pounds, then you’re probably wheezing and waddling down the road.
Vanessa Reece, you should be ashamed of yourself for violating the standards you yourself set for PETA. And by declaring that you can’t be over 200 pounds and health, and that anyone who says otherwise is “BS-ing ourselves” you are bullying people into believe they are unhealthy.
Shame on you.
Incidentally, I did a search of her site for Fat Acceptance and Size Acceptance and many of those posts have been removed. Looks like she did a scrub down before the lifestyle revolution.
I will be posting shortly about this subject as a quick followup. Thanks for bringing this to our attention, Rachelle!
Peace,
Shannon
I weigh around 265 pounds and I neither waddle nor do I normally wheeze. I do have mild asthma, so I do occasionally wheeze in response to an allergic trigger and I wheeze when I climb several flights of stairs, but I do not wheeze when engaging in normal walking or moderate exercise. Yes, I said exercise. I am a fatty, and I can exercise.
I do have a slight limp because I have sciatica-brought on by carrying heavy trays when working as a waitress, not from hauling myself about. But a limp is not a waddle.
I do not have type II diabetes or hypertension, both things that all overweight people are supposed to have. My cholesterol is a teeny bit high, but I think that this will improve by eating healthier foods, which I have tended to neglect of late with my horrible schedule. I do not have plaque coating my arteries. I sometimes get heart palpitations, but I always have had these, and they are worse when I don’t get adequate rest. Doctors haven’t been able to find anything wrong with my heart.
Dieting, if one does, should be a personal thing. The “fat people can’t be healthy” message that this blogger was putting across is not very helpful.
I weigh around 265 too and I have to walk about 10 minutes from the train every morning. No waddling, no wheezing. Dieting is personal, as is health, and for someone to say “You CAN’T be healthy if you weigh X pounds” is incredibly insulting.
I just so happened to find a Fathletes blog on the FFFFeed today, which included this post by a 350 pound woman who is going to be running her first 5K and is looking for good shoes.
We’re reaching out to them, and other Fathletes, to put a face on fat and fit.
Peace,
Shannon
I’m 5’5″, 265 atm, and even tho I have had a good portion of my body broken and crushed, I still can exercise and walk w/o wheezing, etc. I work out daily, play on the Wii (which will kick your ass!) work in my garden with hand tools only, and am currently replacing the wood privacy fence as my latest building project. (For those of you not familiar with a tool called a rock bar, it is a 6 foot long steel bar with a chisel a on one end, used to cut through the limestone shelf we sit on top of. If you’ve never used one, it is an experience in itself.) Oh, and did I mention I’m 47? I make the docs angry because my BP and heart are normal. I’m sure Vanessa would accuse me of being in denial. Whoo. I quit listening to evangelical BS like her a long time ago. Total waste of energy.
“Don’t think of it as a diet, think of it as a ‘food plan.’”
- Dr. Steven Frankin
Also, nice courageous move to not have any comments on her post. Kind of like she knows what everyone is going to say.
Hello, I’m nearly 400 lbs and 39 years old, and I don’t have to “struggle” to get off the couch. My biggest health complaint is sleep apnea, and I know skinny people who have that too. I attribute my health to the fact that I have not yo-yo dieted all my life. I tried twice, one low-fat and one Atkins-like, and discovered the truth: your body will stop you from losing weight, no matter how good you are at following a diet, and eventually you will regain.
I know what my body needs. I know what to put in it. I listen to my body. Right now I’m looking forward to the delicious crispy apple I have on my desk. It doesn’t mean I’m losing weight. This is exactly why we need fat acceptance, and why we don’t need people who finally snap under the weight of society’s prejudices and start abusing their bodies by dieting again.
I did a lot of yo-yo dieting in my youth. I was also bulimic. The Atkins-type low carb diets made me want to straight up kill people. I stopped doing them because I didn’t like myself behaving in such a mean fashion. Carbs are the brain’s fuel. The brain does not utilize protein or fats, so if that’s all a person puts in their body, their brain is starving. It sounds like you have a very sensible attitude and I agree, this is why we need size acceptance.
I’ve lurked but never commented here before, and apologies in advance for thread-jacking, but I must take issue with this comment. As, it’s something I have some personal experience with and know a little bit about.
The human brain can run quite well utilizing ketone bodies, and does not require carbohydrates (glucose) to function. And for some of us who are differently brained ketone bodies are our brains’ preferred fuel source, not glucose.
I hope this doesn’t count as ‘diet talk,’ since it has nothing to do with weight loss… but I’ve been on a strict ketogenic diet for over a year and it has been a godsend, has literally given me my life back. You see, I am on the ASD spectrum (Aspie diagnosed,) and I have bipolar disorder (diagnosed,) and narcolepsy (diagnosed,) and severe ADHD (with a heavy emphasis on the hyperactivity, diagnosed,) and a variety of other comorbids including dyslexia and mild aphasia (all diagnosed.) And staying in ketosis has allowed me to get off of most of the toxic, and expensive, meds which I needed to function previously. I no longer require anti-depressants, and I am on half the dose of stimulants (for both the ADHD and the narcolepsy) which I required prior to going ketogenic.
I would not recommend a ketogenic diet to anyone. It comes with some serious health risks of its own (like kidney stones,) and anyone living full-time in deep ketosis should be monitored regularly by their physicians, preferably including a neurologist who is well versed in ketogenic diet protocols. And it is a hell of a lot of work and not any fun at all, weighing and measuring everything that goes in my mouth and watching the clock and eating on a rigid schedule. And I can never enjoy many of my favorite foods again. But those personal sacrifices are worth it, to me. And for many other people living with fairly extreme differently brainedness and/or serious brain injuries.
Also, the first few months were quite uncomfortable indeed, both physically and mentally, as my metabolism changed and my body, including my brain, learned to adjust to using ketone bodies for fuel. But again, all the temporary discomfort and moodiness and fatigue was worth it to me. Over the longer term my moods have flattened out and become much less extreme even placid, my sleep/wake cycles have normalized including a drastic reduction in episodes of sleep paralysis seizures, my hyperactivity and perpetual kinetic physical actions have dropped off to nearly nothing, my focus and concentration and memory and word recall are all greatly improved, and I have much better executive brain function now (i.e., I can make myself stop an activity if I need or want to stop without becoming obsessively fixated and over-focused.) And, as a nice bonus my flagging post-menopausal libido has returned to levels I hadn’t experienced, on or off SSRIs, since high school. *grin*
Again, maintaining a strict ketogenic diet is not a way of life I would recommend to anyone. But it is doable, and it is definitely not starvation. And, for me at least, it is much preferable to taking handfuls of toxic meds and enduring their unpleasant and dangerous side effects every day.
There is a good deal of research on the effectiveness and success of ketogenic diets in treating childhood epilepsy, related seizure disorders, and a variety of brain malfunctions and injuries. And although it has been studied far less to date, there is also some very intriguing research which shows that a ketogenic diet can be an effective treatment intervention for some bi-polar individuals and for some people on the autistic spectrum, particularly if they also suffer from any form of seizure disorder.
Every body is different. And different foods can effect different peoples’ bodies in profoundly different ways. But, at least for me and for some people who are brained like me, carbohydrates and sugars are brain poison. Living in full-time ketosis has given me the opportunity to live a relatively normal relatively drug free life for the first time in my nearly 50 years on this planet. I’ll always live with some degree of brain disability. But I am a much happier much more functional disabled person, and a better friend, wife, and family member now that my disabilities have become less prominent time monopolizers. I only wish one of my (too many) doctors had suggested the possibility of going ketogenic much earlier.
Apologies again for thread-jacking, and for the length of this comment. But I wanted to provide enough detail and background for clarity, as well as countering the unhelpful myth that ketogenic living is ZOMG starvation.
Respectfully…
DB, 100% carb free and very definitely not starving
DB,
Thanks for the comment. Definitely NOT diet talk. Specific diets for specific conditions has nothing to do with the promotion of weight loss, so no worries.
That was a fascinating account of how dietary changes, such as your ketogenic diet, can have a profound impact on your health. I love hearing about biological differences in people, as well as emerging research in budding fields, such as those for ASD. I hope it continues to provide you the brain fuel you need.
And, finally, welcome from out of the shadows!
Peace,
Shannon
Her post hurt me and saddened me in more ways than I can even begin to describe. Her harsh language, rudeness, and general cruelty to other fat people made me cringe - and has in fact slightly depressed my day.
Wake up? How about YOU wake up to the fact that you just alienated the entire group
Of people who embraced you AS YOU ARE. the people you are now berating and demeaning.
I have never been do disappointed and outright disgusted.
I feel exactly the same way, almost betrayed actually. I hope any fatosphere feed mods have the good sense to remove her blog from them as it’s unbelievably triggering.
Lauren,
I’m not sure if Vanessa’s blog is on the Fatosphere feed, but I know Bri would not tolerate this either. As for our FFFFeed, we have removed her from circulation.
Peace,
Shannon
I think the rudeness really was what got me… I mean, sure, fine, decide to go on a diet, whatever - I got no room to talk on that front.
But there’s no need to get all mean about other people who do not want to join you.
In the interest of fairness, I have informed Vanessa about this post, as well as offered her an opportunity to submit an unedited guest post to explain her position.
Peace,
Shannon
That’s mighty fair of you, there, Shannon
Fierce, but fair, that’s my goal.
Peace,
Shannon
It may be the Maoist stuff I have finally been driven into reading by the people who make everyone who wants everything good come in danger of being called one, but I am starting to use the term “reductionist roader” to describe this phenomenon. (Mao’s faction in the Chinese government described officials in the party he believed were doing things that would lead to capitalist restoration as “capitalist roaders”; those people eventually took power in 1976 with the result being the China we now see for better and in many cases for worse). I don’t have any qualms about using that kind of language, in fact I think makes a lot of sense to say that fat acceptance has lines and programs and that those who want to make thinness (or less-fatness) the be all and end all of the fat individual’s existence have theirs, and that there is a quite plain and open fight between the two, as well as those who are undecided or wonder if there are ways of having feet in both camps.
I think anyone objectively looking at health practices has to deplore the fact that the reductionists have done everything possible to make the word “diet” mean nothing but “reduction diet”, particularly as applied to the fat population. There are a lot of purposes for choosing certain foods or exercises that can have nothing to do with altering weight or fat. I certainly think there is far less impulse of fat-acceptance partisans to be resistant to these. What we resist is the forced lineariztion, the one-dimensional, the “this is the only thing you should be doing with your life” character of the reductionist line.
It certainly does not help at all when those who decide on some amount of weight reduction take on allies in the factions which themselves deplore fat-acceptance and provoke them to either start becoming press gangs for abandoning fat-acceptance or to make the minutiae of their weight reduction methodology dominate their public presence.
Ok, So I just finished a wordy response on the link on FB to this blog after reading the blog . Then I came back reread the blog, reread Statistical’s personal blog/page and Vanessa’s web page and some of her blogs….
As I alluded in my FB comments I think it’s great that FFF is about the inclusion of all of those who want to be a part of the FA movement and won’t ban dieters just diet talk. I know because in the past, even at my heaviest, which was enough to qualify me for weight loss surgery I still was not welcomed in certain FA groups in my own local community because I wasn’t “fat enough”. I know the hypocrisy that I found when it came to the weight loss surgery community (if I ever learn how to not jump in ideas all over the place, and keep it under 5 million words) and if there is an interest, I could do a blog about it sometime if there is an interest. I left the community at my thinnest actually because I couldn’t handle the hypocrisy of the formerly fat being so fat phobic once they lost weight. It wasn’t after my weight gain, it was before. There are so many components though for those while most know someone who has had weight loss surgery, the cultness of it is absolutely amazing, because I differed from most right from the start, its amazing the few years I had belonging to certain groups, I lasted as long as I did.
I have said before that as a movement anyone who believes in FA shouldn’t be discounted if they have lost weight or trying to do so, they just shouldn’t be preaching about it. Because there still a lot of work to do in trying to eradicate fat phobia and fat bashing anyone who wants to help eradicate that should be welcomed. Because we live in such a fat phobic society it unfortunately ,its not only helpful but necessary to help the movement of having thin people say its wrong to fat bash. Because too many fat phobic/fat bashers have such stupid misconceptions about people of size and those who do advocacy for it, that unfortunately to help “sell” it to the public, having people who are thin, such as the Fuck Yeah I am skinny people, be a part of it. Because most of the thin population think people who are fat just sit on their asses eating double whoppers watching Springer all day and do advocacy because they are too lazy to do something about their weight or they are too stupid to know anything about nutrition.
I think everyone can be hypocritical to a certain point. I love the fact on how Statistical calls Vanessa out on her change. And I can tell you from someone who has studied marketing, most people wont buy healthy lifestyle coaching about weight loss while someone is trying to do it. She now also alienated anyone who is in the size acceptance realm, by her posts in trying to capture potential clients for straight lifestyle coaching in some of the blogs I found in her website by now preaching how wonderful her life is going to be now that she is avoiding bakeries and is working out a lot. This is not a good time for those who are in lifestyle and health coaching. The economy is really bad. People aren’t gonna pay if they are looking for a ticket to the land of thinness from someone who ain’t thin.And anyone who would have thought for lifestyle coaching from her who is fat, she can now forget em them..
While I think a lot like Statistical, and give her credit for her attibuting her/your weight loss due to not necessarily a healthy diet originally, by having the name you do, some how gives me the impression that there is a special accomplishment by being in the 5% that have kept their weight loss longer then 5 years, I think in your case it’s 9. I am glad you feel healthy and good, and I, while I can’t exercise like I used to, in my case with being in the land of thin had something to do with having a past history of weight loss surgery I don’t think your bad in anyway, I identify with your love of exercise for example, I just can’t do it like I used to because of my health issues. I think though it can intefere of how someone perceives you as a Fat Activist by primarily identifying yourself as someone who has maintained a large weight loss for a long period of time when most people can’t, its not the fact that you lost the weight itself. I just think it can create a barrier within our community and the message your trying to give, to others outside of it that’s how you are primarily identified, if someone does read your blog even though as I said before I love the fact you are honest and your advocacy has in foundation in trying to help other people. So I am not trying to be a bitch as it applies to you or attack you in any way,Statistical. Vanessa however I could have a field day with the extent of hypocrisy.
I am not this huge genius myself I think those of us who feel passionate about FFF have something to contribute. I know I most definately must irritate the shit out of some people, even though that’s not my intention, and there might be a few who find something I say valuable. So it’s too bad I could do it with this response but yeah I think its great, that a NEWLY converted weight loss evangelist who needs to add she was a “model” in the plus size world, was called out on it. And I think it’s great it can be differentiated that someone who tries to lose weight, or is thin can still have credibility and respect in this intelligent,enlightening, sometimes really funny and very welcoming FA community.
I think that sometimes the fact that my own FA point of view is colored by the fact that I had experienced long term weight loss prior to discovering FA can be a barrier when talking in FA circles, but I think that I can overcome that through my message.
Interestingly, I picked the name Statistical Freak specifically for the slightly negative connotation in the word freak… as my story, I think, often functions as more of a warning than any kind of exhortation… but I do see what you’re saying about the message of it being right up there in the blog name.
This morning, I did a 1.5 hr session of pilates, followed by a 1 hour walk, somehow all without wheezing or waddling. I’m a novice Scottish Highland athlete (look on YouTube to see some fun examples of my hobby), flip bus tires and push my trainer’s Jeep around the parking lot for fun and ran a 5K and raised $3k for charity doing it, again, without wheezing or waddling(ok, so I do breathe heavily but it’s a Jeep, for pete’s sake! lol). I’m also a belly dancer who performs intricate routines with a group of women - yes, with my belly exposed even and again, nary a wheeze. My doctor was downright pleased with my important numbers during my physical a few months ago.
Guess what? I weigh 240 lbs. I CHALLENGE anyone who calls me unhealthy to a handshake squeeze, to arm wrestle, to a dead lift contest, or a sled pull, or whatever. I am soooo freakin’ tired of the fat=unhealthy claptrap I could explode!!!!!!!!
I’ve never heard of Vanessa’s blog until now, but it’s quite clear she’s in a honeymoon phase like the majority of most dieters. If she is not in that 5%, then she will probably gain back the wait and be even more miserable.
For the last 10 years, my weight has been anywhere from 330-360. During those years, I worked as an activities assistant at a nursing home. It is a very physically demanding job and I came home tired almost every day. For 8 hours five days a week, I was on my feet, pushing residents in wheelchairs, bending, stooping, squatting, walking around the entire building. If you weren’t doing anything, work was found for you. I managed to do this without huffing and puffing and wheezing. I don’t want to hear people like Vanessa tell me that only thin people can be physical and healthy.
I believe because I have maintained my weight (even though it’s considered deadly) and have not drastically dieted, but only cut down on soda intake and increased water intake in a hope to control occasional IBS, I am perhaps more healthy than someone who consistently yo-yo diets. My cholesterol could be lower, but my heart, lungs and sugar levels are great. Our bodies should not be public property for people to play the health game with, and we don’t have to “do it too.”
Unfortunately, until people like Vanessa realize to mind their own business and worry about their bodies, we will continue to hear crap like this.