Coming Up For Air

You laugh now but just wait!

I was worried when my buddy Shannon came looking for me wondering where I’d been and why I hadn’t shown up on the early fall schedule that I’d have some lame-ass excuse like “life held me hostage” or “I got the first three seasons of True Blood on DVD,” but I’m glad to say that wasn’t the case.

I’ve always been famous for great disappearing acts and, even though I will admit to roaming the aisles of the local IKEA while listening to ABBA on an endless loop in order to feel closer to Alexander Skarsgard, I can tell you that I’ve simply been suffering the after-effects of a long commute, child fatigue syndrome and the dreaded “writer’s block.”

Yes, me.

The motor-mouthed, yarn-spinning, tangent-thrower is at a loss for words.

I started a bit about the adorable Mike & Molly actress Melissa McCarthy’s Emmy win, but deemed it too far in the past to make any sort of impact. Then I spent 35 minutes looking online for an Israeli issue gas mask after reading a particularly unnerving article about germ warfare, but not before being distracted by a picture of Christina Hendricks boobs stuffed into that silver dress.

Wait, what was I saying?

So are you beginning to see how somethings don’t get finished over here?